Q value of a passive single stage RC low pass filter

There's many ways to answer that, here are some to throw out ideas:

1) since it is a second order filter with 2X slope per octave then you can argue that it should be sqrt(10) X.

2) typically though that measurement might also take into account the ripple and constrain it so that a fixed factor may not be apropos. In your case of critically damped this doesn't hold, but in a more general sense perhaps a simple factor isn't the right criteria.

3) Since I work with S&H system and switched cap we don't use a 10X but how many time periods until settled to within the error budget of the system (so it's variable depending upon what is being designed).

The -3dB point is your cutoff frequency. It's just standard practice to define it that way. In order to find what your values should be, I'd go with equal element implementation (it's simpler, and you can correct for gain with a simple gain stage later if you need to). Choose R1=R2, C1=C2, and pick a value for either R or C. This yields the following formula for the cutoff frequency: $$f_0=\frac{1}{2\pi RC}$$ I generally choose a value of C initially, as it's easier to find or make a resistor with a strange value, whereas it's more difficult with capacitors. So, set your cutoff frequency equal to f0, and solve for R.

Here's an example: let's say I want a LPF with f0=250 Hz. I'll choose C to be 0.1 micro and solve for R. $$250=\frac{1}{2\pi RC} \rightarrow 250=\frac{1}{2\pi R(0.1x10^{-6})}\rightarrow R\approx6400\Omega.$$

From there, all you need to do is implement your circuit. Once you know what your value for R is supposed to be, you can use a dual-channel potentiometer that has the correct resistance within it's range in place of the two resistors (for the above example, something like a 10k ohm potentiometer would do the trick). This will allow you to change your cutoff frequency, since it's based upon both R and C.

Edit: As Matt Young suggested in the comments, adding a resistor in series with the potentiometer will set the maximum cutoff, and prevent shorts. It's an excellent addition to the circuit, and will keep some sanity when adding the potentiometers.