Using 27MHz car with 49MHz remote control

All of the Remote Starter systems I have seen are aftermarket products. In fact, most auto dealers use these after market products when installing them in new vehicles. It should be easy enough to find the manufacture of yours, and send for a replacement remote fob. Once the fob is programmed to your vehicle, you can hack the contacts to your new circuit.

As far as sensing the engine running most of these units use a sample of the engine RPM (tach) and detect the pulses. The RPM outputs on the ECU of the vehicle, and is probably already tapped to use for the Remote Start unit. For the report back function, you can buy a remote fob & receiver and hack it in much the same way as your starter key fob.

EDIT: After reviewing the new information and pictures, I will revise my answer to the following:

If the led in fig 1 (lower right corner) is the confirmation of a start indicator, then a photo transistor can be optically coupled to this led through something like a short hose or tube. This can then be an input of the Arduino.

EDIT 2: In fig 1, middle of the board may be a tactile button switch to initiate a start. If this is the case, a relay could be connected to the Arduino output and wired to the tactile switch in parallel.

Definitely possible, but you'll need more than the antenna. The remote controller has a 27 MHz RF transmitter, which sends the data to the car. That has an RF receiver, which gets the up/down, left/right data from the RF signal. You need both the transmitter and receiver.

Check the remote controller's electronics. You'll have a PCB to which the antenna is connected. This will have a couple of wires coming from from the battery, and a few coming from your controls. Use a multimeter to see what their signal looks like when you handle the controls. That will probably be simple signals, like 0 V = left, 4.5 V = straight ahead, 9 V = right. Something like that.

Same for the receiver's side. You have power supply, and outputs going to the motor(s) and maybe a solenoid. Measure what comes out when you use the remote controller.

Arduino works at 5 V, and its I/O's can only output 0 V or 5 V. You'll probably need a few components, resistors, and maybe a transistor to create the signals for the transmitter from Arduino. It depends on what the signals look like.

On the receiver side you have more options. Apart from the digital inputs (0 V or 5 V) Arduino has analog inputs, which can detect a range of input voltages. The receiver's output signals will probably be digital as well, though, if they control a motor (on/off, forward/reverse). The voltage level will probably not be 5 V. Again a transistor may adapt the level for the Arduino's 5 V.

If you want to play with wireless a cheap but interesting alternative can be the RFM70:

It's a small transceiver module you can directly connect to Arduino to transmit and receive any amount of data you want, so you're not restricted to the couple of controls from your RC. Costs only a few dollars.