Almost all of them promise me x-MB RAM and y-MB dynamically.
I'm a programmer but I don't understand how they decide which process needs to be killed if I alloc memory and keep it for such a long time that they need to. I mean let's say a php-fcgi server instance is running up to 500MB, I don't have a problem killing it but they shouldn't kill my mysqld or lighttpd which is only started during boot time.
I couldn't find anything in the FAQ or support form of a handful of providers I checked.
Best Answer
Processes consuming too much RAM under Linux are typically killed by the kernel's
oom-killerprocess. OOM standing for "Out Of Memory". You can read a description of the decision process that it makes here and how to influence it's behaviour here.